How to be a New Zealander

Well, I've traveled the country North to South and seen many of its most beautiful sites, but its time I write a little bit more about New Zealand and its people. I've spent just about my entire time living in homes of kiwis, adapting their lifestyle and observing their ways. A year-abroad in a foreign-speaking land, and I'd probably be fluent. I still cannot for the life of me impersonate a New Zealand accent, but I think that I can say that I have a pretty good understanding of New Zealanders and the culture as a whole. (And I'm sorry to say, that being a New Zealander has very little to do with Hobbits). New Zealand's The Listener magazine (equivalent to America's Time), printed an article on the main elements of Kiwiness. I thought I'd use a few their main points and comment with experiences of my own.
The number one aspect that makes a kiwi, a kiwi is their connection to the land. If you've seen any of my photos, you should understand why. New Zealand has been behind the rest of the world in industrializing, and much of the country is still rural and not heavily populated, leaving its natural wonders protected and relatively untouched. Owning a bach (a holiday home) in addition to their own home, is a must for most New Zealanders. These aren't ritzy, American-like, holiday homes, but more like rustic houses in beautiful places (that resemble shacks to American standards.) The concept of sending kids to summer camps is virtually unknown in New Zealand, because the entirity of summer holidays are spent with families at their bachs up away in mountains, the bush, or beaches. While my host family here runs an outdoor education camp, it is closed during the summer holidays and open only during the school year for area schools to visit and (fulfilling their outdoor education curriculum component which is essential in NZ schools..hint hint America?)
Sport is another big kiwiism. The All-Blacks are the most well-known New Zealand sports team and are the best Rugby team in the world (hosting the Rugby World Cup next year.) Kiwis say competative sport fuels their need to be noticed by bigger countries. It is a small country but produces great athletes, and the culture as a whole is very athletic. Sport and relationship to the land also go hand-in-hand. Skiing, rock-climbing, and tramping (backpacking) and the sheer chase of adrenaline are common for a New Zealander. New Zealanders are extremely laid back, but perhaps that is because all their energy goes into scaling mountains and snowboarding on active volcanoes over the weekend. It is not uncommon for New Zealanders to have various near-death experiences when seeking adventure in the outdoors. Each of my hosts have, one being hit by a plummeting boulder while mountaineering NZ's highest mountain, Mt. Cook, and the other nearly drowning when his kayak was sucked into an unknown spinning hole in high grade rapids.
That brings us to the next kiwism- the "she'll be right" mentality. New Zealanders don't stress, they don't argue, and they barely make any plans. They do things themselves and don't ask for help. They sail boats to Tonga, they build their own houses, they fix what is broken (nothing is ever broken, just in need of repair). Their houses and cars don't sparkle like ours, but they are just fine about that. They give me their car keys and their children, a map if I'm lucky and expect me to drive through foreign cities and get to appointments on time. Are they worried? No, because "I'll be right." This is an ad that encompasses this kiwiism on the dot-and also their dislike of Australians (kind of like the whole Canada-America thing). Plus, you get a peak into my everyday life of how cute 4-yr old NZ kids are: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqRVqXMyzhM
And of course there are the accents, or 'accints'. Not British or Australian, but Kiwi vowels are in a league of their own. Vowels are strung out into outer space it seems. "How are you" becomes "how are yewooo." 'R's are left out completely within words, and entire sentences are mumbled together in what sounds like one word. Almost everything sounds like a question. 'Eh,' is attached to every kind of word or sentence you can imagine. And of course there's the use of 'mate' and 'bro.' Okay its New Zealand, using 'mate' is fair enough, but coming from America where bro is originally black vernacular (or maybe white-frat boy vernacular too now), the use of bro is limited by nothing, used by everyone, even girls to one another. But of course its not just 'bro,' but its more like 'braoewe,' or basically how many other rounded vowels you can throw in after the 'br' part. Perhaps what took the most getting used to was the New Zealand phrase 'sweet as.' Coined from the term 'sweet as honey' New Zealanders use 'sweet as' to describe anything good. "Those waves were sweet as, bro!" And if that's not weird enough, New Zealanders also throw any word in before the as- 'cold as, sunburned as, fun as, sick as, hungry as.' Here's a popular video made by Australians depicting the overuse of 'bro' and the 'sweet as' phenomenon. If you listen carefully, you can tell they're Australian, but to an American they sound very Kiwi: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZdVHZwI8pcA . Further, good for you is 'good on ya,' how are you doing is 'how are you going, 'thank you is 'chur,' and the list goes on and on. I guess when only 4 million people, make up a country on an island this far away from the rest of the world, anything goes. Alas, I must admit I've grown quite an affinity for being called 'Pheybey.'.
And then there's the Maori part of New Zealand culture. I was literally dumbfounded upon my arrival to see that the Native inhabitants are not an echo of the past or hidden out of view on reservation land. Maori culture is alive and well, and so are its people. It is not of course absent of its own challenges and racism, but the integration of Maori to Pakeha (european) NZ culture (or is it the other way around?) is absolutely inspiring, exciting, and astonishing. The treaty signed between the NZ government and Maori requires all New Zealand schools to have a strong Maori education component. This means, learning Maori from pre-school age and having Marae visits throughout the entire schooling process. I visited a marae one day with 8-yr old Lucy, where we sang songs, learned Maori dances, and wove flax. During the introduction, each 8-yr old (mostly white kids) stood up and explained who they were, about their family, and where they came from (their mihimihi) all in Maori. I've even learned a hand-full or words that are used quite commonly like whanau (family) or kai (food). My 4-yr old friend, Charlotte teaches me these. It hasn't always been like this. This push of Maori culture back into New Zealand culture as a whole is only a recent thing after a more forgotten period. But regardless, how cool! America could learn a lot perhaps on cultural integration and race-relations. Hillary Clinton said it herself, how impressed she was by the presence of Maori culture in New Zealand on a recent trip here. Take a look at the bone-chilling haka performed by the All-Blacks before a rugby game. Can you imagine an American football team doing an American Indian war dance before the start of the game? Clearly not. New Zealand is awesome. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdMCAV6Yd0Y
New Zealand was a British colony, so the practice of tea-drinking is important as, bro. I have no problem with this, because I love tea. But never have I learned before that there are so many right or wrong ways to make a pot of tea. Coffee as well, blows American coffee out of the water. New Zealanders like good coffee, and they treat it like an art form and make it right. Trendy NZ coffee bars fill the country, along with a few Starbucks (for the tourists, Kiwis hate).
And last but not least, Kiwis have a sense of humour. Not outright, in your face kind of humour, but they love to laugh and slip witty remarks throughout everyday conversation. Their quick wit leaves me in the dust at time, but I've managed hold my own sense of humour, or at least nod at laugh at theirs.
So to summarize, New Zealand culture is close to the land because its some of the most beautiful in the world, they love sports and they love outdoor adventure, they don't stress but live their lives under the idea that they'll be alright, they speak what sounds like gibberish (or British gone hillbilly?), they are a leading example in maintaining strong indigenous culture, and they drink a lot of tea and make good coffee while telling jokes and laughing a lot. Summer is coming and they are all headed to their baches to be with their families amongst a pristine environment. And perhaps the kiwiism I most covet of all- now is the time of year where everyone walks around barefoot. I'm talking, an entire society of New Zealanders walking through town, buying groceries, stopping at the post shop, young and old, BAREFOOT. After months of deeming this unfathomable, I decided to give this a try on one measly walk from the local shop to home. With flip-flops in hand, I subjected my dainty, American-bred feet across concrete sidewalk, sticks and gravel. Losing my balance, grimacing in pain, hoping that the car next to me wasn't slowing down oggling because of me, I made it home in twice the amount of time I normally would. The bottoms of my feet were not happy, but I'll try again. Afterall, I am American. But thank gooodness for air-travel and the ability to travel the world and witness this bizarre, shoeless, island culture I've gotten to call home for almost a year. A place where you can go skiing, scale a mountain, kayak a river, go for a bush-walk, drink good coffee, speak in Maori, say things like "Sweet as...chur bro, good on ya!" and not turn heads, and walk around barefoot all in one day.